Looking good, healing good

Retail therapy, chemotherapy, om . . .

Knitting got me through the days after my chemo treatments.  But, retail therapy got me to my chemo appointments. 

Before most (all) chemo treatments, I stopped at lululemon for a little retail therapy (the upper east side lululemon location is one block away from the Evelyn Lauder Breast Center).  Every other Thursday, I would bribe myself.  A little retail therapy, a little chemotherapy.  I could buy myself a  new sweatshirt (tee shirt, yoga pants, tank top . . .), but then I had to go have an IV stuck in my arm for a few hours and feel like crap for four days.  A little crazy, but it worked.

I had a mantra, if I could look reasonably good, I could feel good.  And, if I couldn't look like me (and I didn't), I would look good as me going through cancer.  Om . . .

When I started to lose my eyebrows, I bought eyebrow powders and gels.  But, I also bought new sunglasses that helped me look a little less snake eyed.  Looking good (or a least not looking "cancer sick"), feeling good.  Om . . .

Now I have a new retail "need."  I need to find an attractive, comfortable bra for women who have had a unilateral mastectomy with reconstruction.  I'm searching for a bra that can support my old breast and not over support my reconstructed breast.

My name is Barbara.  I had breast cancer.  And, I have split personality breasts.  One needs a lot of support.  The other needs none.  Other than a custom made bra--what's the solution?  There must be (or should be) a hybrid bra out there for women like me.  I haven't found it yet.  I've been cutting the under-wire out of my old bras and just making do.  It's a good solution.  It's not great. 

There's gotta be a better bra out there.  Because, there are many (too many) women like me who have had breast cancer and unilateral mastectomies with reconstruction.  What bras are they wearing?

So, readers, any suggestions?

Now, close to one year after my mastectomy, the bras with Velcro loops for my surgical drains are a distant memory.  The bras that I wore through my reconstructive expansion that zippered up the front are long gone.  Both styles, by the way, were very sexy.

I emailed the people at Spanx to ask them about researching a new bra line.  They have the "Brallelujah" to help women eliminate bra strap marks.  Maybe they can develop the "Bar-bra" for women like me--women with split personality breasts.  Maybe they can name the cups "flopsy" and "mopsy."  Maybe they can work with the people at Sloan Kettering (or me) to develop it.   And maybe they can sell the "Bar-bras" at the boutique at the Breast Center.  Maybe.

I'm onto a whole new phase of retail therapy.

Because, if I'm looking okay, I'm feeling pretty good.  For me that's most of the battle.

And, if I'm winning the battles, the cancer war is (a little) less scary.