Sunday, January 2, 2011

In with the Old . . .

That was then . . .


True to my plan, I'm re-posting all of my CaringBridge entries.  So that all of my entries can live here together.  I'm starting with just the first few.

It's an interesting "scrap book" of the year.  The initial posts written by Jay and then later by me were so clinical.  And, then over time, I see that I really started to use CaringBridge to share and also process all of the craziness of the year.  

It's funny, I don't get emotional at all when I re-read the posts on the posts on my surgeries and my mastectomy.  Even the chemo entries seem so distant now.  Looking back, it turned out that once I found my surgeon, the surgeries were easy.  But, re-reading the posts about E and A . . . and reading about those days of trying to figure out how to help them deal with all that was going on . . . I sit at the computer just like I did when I originally wrote the entries, with tears running down my cheeks and onto the key board.

Cancer, manageable.  Cancer with small children was and continues to be challenging.



January 2010

I was diagnosed with breast cancer in December 2009.   We all have a story.  This is the beginning of one chapter of my story.
January 26, 2010
As I'm getting ready for surgery tomorrow, I'm overwhelmed by how much support and love I have gotten from family and friends.  It means so much and has really kept me going through what seems to have been a very long wait from diagnosis to surgery. 
It's going to be difficult to keep in touch with everyone on an individual basis this week--so please check in on this website.  J and I will try to update it often.
With much love,
Barbara
Tuesday, January 26, 2010 5:25 PM, EST
I just got the scheduling phone call from Sloan.  They need me to arrive at the hospital at 9:00; they'll do a small needle procedure at 10:30, and then surgery at 1:00.  J will be with me during the down time between 10:30 and 1:00. 
So that's the latest--we'll keep you posted . . .
much love,
b.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010 9:55 AM, EST
Hi all. We've arrived at the hospital. Barbara is now getting prepped (iv and paperwork, health care proxy) and then it's off to get a locator put in so they know exactly where to operate. It's not as nice here as at the Sloan spa on 66th street but this seems to be the original hospital site. Keep you all posted. - J

Wednesday, January 27, 2010 1:46 PM, EST
Barbara was just taken by the surgeon (Dr. Heerdt is always so cheerful) and she says it should be about 90 minutes until they are done. At that time, I should be able to see her as she wakes up. Barbara was a bit upset that the 3 other women here today are just having a lumpectomy with no lymph node involvement (so they think I told her). Anyway, she didn't have too much time to dwell on that as she was whisked off to first meet the anesthesiologist and then by Dr. Heerdt to enter the OR. Will keep u all posted once she comes to in recovery.
TTFN

Wednesday, January 27, 2010 2:43 PM, EST
Bs surgery just finished. Dr. Heerdt came out to tell me that there were no surprises (that's good bc we don't need any) and that everything is removed that could possibly be an issue. They won't have pathology for a week more but aside from the one lymph node we knew about, the others seemed to at least look normal and in any event, they're all gone with what they think are sufficient margins. I should be able to go into recovery shortly. Will post again once I actually get to see her. Thanks to all for the help and goo wishes.
J

Thursday, January 28, 2010 8:51 PM, EST
Just want to post and let everyone know that Barbara is doing very well post-surgery.  Although tired and in a little pain, she was up and about today and able to eat and even do some of the arm exercises.  Thanks to all of you that have sent flowers, food and gifts.  We can't tell you how much we all appreciate this.  We haven't had to cook at all since we've been home and our house looks and smells great with all of the flowers.  And we are all touched by those of you who have e-mailed (she is checking regularly now) or called to say you were thinking of her or wanted to know if there was anything we needed.

Saturday, January 30, 2010 8:20 PM, EST
January 30 - 3 days post-op
Barbara continues to get stronger and is doing very well post surgery.  Today she was able to shower for the first time (although a little reluctant to do so).  She is already able to master all of the arm strengthening exercises (that I think some people can't even do pre-surgery) thanks to all that yoga.  She is a bit freaked out by having to carry that drain thing around (which catches all of the fluids due to the lymph nodes being removed) but that should come out within a few days.  I do all of the drain stuff so she doesn't have to deal with that (for those of you who don't know, Barbara often passes out at the sight of blood).  Apparently, I am much better at that than I am at fluffing pillows and loading dishwashers.  Today, Barbara also stayed home and rested for a few hours by herself while the kids and I went off to the movies.  The kids were thrilled to see the "Tooth Fairy". 

The kids are doing just fine.  Many have volunteered to take them for after school play dates in the coming days.  Some have bought them activity gifts (which they don't understand really is a gift for Barbara) and they have kept themselves busy for hours.  Although I don't wish this upon anyone, it really has been good for them to see how others around them react to someone close to them getting sick.  Someone said to us at the beginning that it would be difficult for them, but not damaging. 

I go back to work on Monday.  The plan is for me to take the kids to school in the morning and then we have friends that have volunteered to help out in the PM for the first few days.  Barbara thinks she'll be able to drive by the end of next week.  She'll probably be somewhat relieved to have me gone during the day -- now that I've read that Anti-Cancer book, I think I'm making her crazy with the no sugar, green tea, turmeric diet. 

We have a post-op appointment with the surgeon on Feb 11th.  That's when we'll get the full pathology report and discuss next steps.   We've been told that they don't really want to discuss chemotherapy or radiation until they have that report.  We know that they won't do anything more for 4-6 weeks to allow the body to fully heal from the surgery.  So, that's the plan for the next few weeks.

Thanks again for the support from all of you!!  We really do appreciate it.
Jay
Friday, February 5, 2010 9:26 PM, EST
So, it’s been about a week since the last posting, so I thought I would do a quick update.  Barbara has made a pretty amazing recovery.  She's back to driving and taking the kids to school and even doing and having a few home repairs done.   By looking at her, you'd never know she just had surgery.

The initial pathology report came back this week and the news was very good (at least the docs at Sloan seemed pleased).  The tumor removed was under 2cm in total size (which is apparently good).  And there were 2 lymph nodes affected out of the 19 removed -- the sentinel node (which we knew going in) and a trace in the next node.  We're not exactly sure what this all means just yet, but it will likely impact the next stage of treatment.  Speaking of next stage, we have our first visit with the oncologist scheduled in about 2 weeks (to discuss chemo).  We also have a follow-up visit with the surgeon this week to make sure all is healing well and remove that annoying drain.

For the next few weeks, Barbara will be getting back to her normal routines, trying to get as strong as possible before she has to start chemo.  I'm sure she'll be getting back to yoga as soon as she can.  She's been really trying to eat even healthier -- avoiding most white flour and sugar (which feed the cancer) and drinking lots of green tea, eating more fruits/vegetables and eating lots of turmeric (that spice in Indian food which is apparently great for fighting breast cancer).  It's apparently very important to walk 1/2 hour a day, so we'll likely be getting a treadmill so that she can do this daily.  All of this is supposed to make the chemo easier and more effective.

The kids have been doing well too.  Our kids are not used to having others drive them to school or take them to after school activities, so this was an adjustment for them.  E has now been picking A up at his classroom to make it easier for Barbara to pick them up at school.  Their teachers have both been great throughout all of this and have taken the time to give both of them a little bit of special attention.

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So that's the update for now.  We'll continue to keep you all posted.  Thanks again to all of you that have provided your support and love.  
Jay 



A year later . . .

This is now . . . Happy 2011!



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